Washington Schlepped Here : Walking in the Nation's Capital

by Christopher Buckley

Release Date: 08 April, 2003

Edition: Hardcover

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Buckley being Buckley...always a good thing

I am neither ardent Republican nor Democrat. But, I am an ardent Christopher Buckley fan. I've read most of his books and find him to be unfailingly witty and insightful. And, if you've ever seen him doing his schtick in person, you'd realize that he doesn't take himself that seriously.

So, if you scrutinize this book looking for evidence of partisanship, you're surely going to find it. But consider the way Buckley presents it: screaming across the room to get Dick Cheney's attention, he is self-aware enough to acknowledge that his behavior is a source of embarrassment to his children. And as for those who might criticize his penchant for name-dropping, consider the following passage:

"For two years I had a White House pass that allowed me everywhere except, of course, the second-floor residence. One time, hearing that Jimmy Cagney was about to get the Medal of Freedom in the East Room - where Abigail Adams hung her wash out to dry, where Lincoln's body lay in state, and where I once sat behind Dynasty star Joan Collins while she and husband number four (I think it was) spelunked in each other's mouths with their tongues while Andy Williams crooned 'Moon River' - I rushed over from the Old Executive Office Building just in time to see President Reagan pin it on the man who had tapped out 'Yankee Doodle Dandy' and was now a sad, crumpled, speechless figure in a wheelchair. I remember Reagan putting his hand on Cagney's shoulder and saying how generous he had been 'many years ago to a young contract player on the Warner Brothers lot.'"

That's typical of the book and of Christopher Buckley's personal style. Just the right combination of name-dropping, humor and reverence. He's silly when can be, and respectful when he needs to be. His 'Washington Schlepped Here' demonstrates a child-like enthusiasm for museums, an insatiable willingness to learn from Park Rangers and other tour guides, and a respectful reverence for George Washington and (especially) Abraham Lincoln.

And despite growing up in a family where Franklin Roosevelt was known only as 'that man,' he pays tribute to the enormity of FDR's achievements when visiting both the FDR Memorial and the Holocaust Museum.

For Christopher Buckley fans and newcomers alike, this book is a great read.

The Same Old Same Old

Buckley's entry in the "Crown Journeys" series is an occasionally amusing, intermittently interesting, and ultimately shallow slim guide to about two of Washington, D.C.'s 67 square miles. His walks cover Union Station, the Capitol, the White House, the Old Executive Office Building, Lafayette Park and Square, Ford's Theater, the Lincoln, Jefferson, Roosevelt, Vietnam War, and Korean War memorials, the Washington Monument, and Arlington Cemetery (which is not in Washington, but across the river in Virginia). In other words, the twenty year resident enlisted to write this book takes the reader to most generic tourist spots in the city, all of which you will find in any reasonably decent regular guidebook. He does this with sometimes funny, sometimes leaden humor, highly leavened with his strong conservative sentiments.

His walks are littered with cribbed historical anecdotes and tales of his glory days in the corridors of power. Buckley came to Washington to join the Reagan administration, and he's not shy about name dropping and telling you all the neato-torpedo insider stuff he saw and did. All which could be overlooked if he actually went anywhere off the beaten track, or acknowledged in the remotest way that D.C. is a large city with actual neighborhoods where people are born, live, and die. Sadly, he takes the opposite route, and chooses to disparage that large swath of people (the vast majority of whom are black) who live in DC and have always done so. In the opening pages, he quotes Joseph Alsop's self-description as "That sad and rootless thing, a Washingtonian" and then goes on to say that DC natives "would probably sniff at that, but then they sniff at pretty much everything." Well, what DC natives sniff at is not being allowed to vote in presidential elections until the mid-60s, and to this day having to pay federal taxes without having a vote in Congress (that's why DC license plates bear the "Taxation Without Representation" tagline). Buckley is emblematic of a whole cadre of people who move to DC-usually to get involved in politics-and never engage with it, never commit to it, and love being there for all the wrong reasons.

To be sure, the book tells plenty of interesting stories about the formation of the city, and especially its chief designer, Pierre L'Enfant. However, the city Buckley details is one of monuments and ghosts, not people and neighborhoods. It's an annoying approach, because there is so much more to the city that the casual tourist would benefit from hearing about. How about the historic U Street area, which has boatloads of black history? How about the The Awakening statue at Hains Point? How about historic Georgetown? How about the Canal? How about the largest urban park in American, Rock Creek Park? How about the amazing National Cathedral or the equally amazing Basilica of the Shrine of the Immaculate Conception? How about the most underrated museum, The Building Museum? How about Dupont Circle, the center of gay culture in the city. How about cool walkable neighborhoods like Adams Morgan, Mt. Pleasant, Brookland, and Takoma Park? Nope, instead, we hear about a invitation only party hosted by the Cheney's in the Museum of American History and Arlington Cemetery (which is an amazing place, but ISN'T IN DC!).

For the monuments and all that, this book isn't a bad supplement to a good guidebook. However, if you really want to learn about the city and the regular people who live there, check out Edward Jones' wonderful collection of short stories, Lost In the City, or pretty much any George Pelecanos' crime novels, or the 1994 book Dream City: Race, Power, and the Decline of Washington, D.C.